If Halloween is one of your favorite holidays, here are ten spooky bottles of wine to help you celebrate all month long!
The majority of these wines are inexpensive and can be found at a Total Wine near you. Most importantly of all, these wines are all SPOOKTACULAR and sure to instill the strongest spirit of Halloween in your dark, witchy soul.
Just look at those spooky trees! This wine is a little bit pricier than most of the bottles on this list, but if you’re going on a date with a witchy-type and want to impress them with some high-quality spooky booze, this is definitely the move. Drink it while telling your favorite ghost story to get your Halloween brewing and bubbling in full gear.
Speaking of witchy, I can’t think of a better Halloween party wine than this spine-chilling bottle. Gather round your coven and pop open a bottle or five of these and you’ll be sure to summon up a fun time. It’s super inexpensive, so you could even mix it with coke to make a spooky party punch.
The name isn’t that spooky, but the story behind the wine is eerie with a capital E! If you were convicted of one of the 19 crimes in 18th century England, you were banished to Australia, which was then thought to be a terrible wasteland. Many of these criminals died on the boat ride over, and those who survived helped found the lawless, sin basin of a continent we’ve all come to know and love.
The label is interactive and will talk to you if you download the 19 Crimes app, and I don't know about you, but I think inanimate talking objects are as creepy as it gets.
You can see all 19 of the crimes that landed criminals in Aussie town here. My personal favorite: “Impersonating an Egyptian.”
This is a pretty well-known bottle that people drink year-round, but what better time to break it out than all hallows eve! This is for the understated Halloween partier -- for the person who throws on a cowboy hat or a name tag that says “I’m Stan from State Farm” and calls it a day. They mostly forgot about the holiday, but they're here to party and want to show some semblance of an effort.
The description on the website claims this wine is made from “a blend of mystical grapes”, and who are we to question the internet! This wine has it all: the monster, the dark red color, the MYSTICAL GRAPES. And just look at that label! An eerie custom font complete with a droplet of blood cascading down into a flickering abyss of smoke and flame!? A little bit confusing because Vampires are killed by fire, but WHO CARES! It is the epitome of the Halloween spirit.
Okay, so Graves might just be the wine region... but also, GRAVES!! This one is for our classy Halloween celebrators who just want to have a semi-spooky bottle of wine with a nice spaghetti (worms) and meatballs (eyeballs). This wine is more about curating a motif of Halloween as opposed to the spirit, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
Our first and final white wine on the list! It’s a good deal and a necessary addition to this round up if you’re anti-red wine. Here we have an entire liter of wine for 10.99, which is scary in its own right, and the bottle is about as festive as you can get. Throw it in a bowl with some sprite and maybe some green sherbet, and you’ve got a ghostly brew that will make you feel like a Halloween queen.
You don’t have to be gaudy to be in a Halloween state of mind! Here’s another bottle for those who want to be festive, but find themed-wine trashy and uncouth. This one comes to you from Australia — which we’ve already learned is the land of blood thirsty criminals — and it pairs perfectly with a screening of Hocus Pocus.
We all love a smooth talking devil, am I right? Another affordable bottle that makes you feel impish and ready to take on the dark, spook-filled night. What caused you to throw cheese dip on Tinkerbell? And why did you throw all of the toilet paper into the hot tub? Who knows. The devil is in the details.
And for the classiest of all Halloween wines, I give you Banshee Pinot Noir. If you’re a parent whose kids just left for college and no longer has to worry about teenagers sneaking off to get trashed in a graveyard AND can finally have a halloween night just for your damn self, I’d suggest picking up a bottle of Banshee on October 31st. I can assure you this wine is no trick — it’s a true Halloween treat.
And there you have it! I hope you’re already feeling the eerie spirit of Halloween running through your ghoulish veins. My Halloween pun well has already run dry, but I am more than ready to get spooky with some of these bottles this October.
Happy Hallo-wine to all my sorcerers, robots, aliens, goblins, fools, and ghouls!